PAPA TRAUMA: THE PRESENT, BUT ABSENT FATHER (EMOTIONAL ABANDONMENT)

We don't have to experience severe wounding to have father wounds related to our childhood experiences with our parents. Neglect comes in many forms, and being present, but absent emotionally can take its toll on us.

In some cases, our mothers or other parents, try to make us (their children) their emotional partners, or everyone in the home just doesn't expect anything emotional from "dad," -- as if he just doesn't have the same demands to show up emotionally as everyone else.

Regardless, this type of fathering, of emotional unavailability/abandonment, often leaves us feeling the wounds of Avoidant Type attachment -- where we are never really mirrored, where we feel abandoned emotionally by the most important (or supposed to be) male figure in our lives, where we become achievement focused and/or lack self esteem - always psychologically trying to get or feel his emotional attachment to us and our lives.

Present but absent fathering is emotional neglect, and though we may see him as "at least he was there," the question is often "was he, though?"

xo

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