The DANGEROUS Truth About Narcissistic Attraction - Chocolate Cake Model

Ever wonder what it is about narcissists that you’re attracted to? Well, it’s very similar to your love for chocolate cake. In this video we're going to talk about the Chocolate Cake Model of dating narcissists and what it means for you and your relationship, and then I’m going to give you some tips to avoid narcissistic enticement.

There is a model called the Chocolate Cake Model that looks at the experience of relationships with narcissists from the partner’s viewpoint. The chocolate cake is a metaphor for describing this experience.

Research on dating patterns of narcissists reveals that their relationships tend to be shallow, fleeting, and deficient in commitment. Narcissists tend to be on the constant search for a better partner, someone smarter, sexier, or more compliant. They’re on the constant prowl for replacements to their current relationship, tend to engage in relationship game-playing, date as a means for self-enrichment, and place little, if any, emphasis on developing emotional depth and intimate relationships with others.

They attract romantic partners by being charming, having or presenting as if they have high social status, and present as sexually attractive in the short term. When we pull all these together we see that when you become involved with a narcissist, there is initially a high level of attraction and a short period of positive feelings toward the narcissistic individual, AKA honeymoon phase, “chocolate cake yummy-time”. However, as time goes on the negative psychological and social factors come out, which includes regret that can last significantly longer than the actual relationship ever does or did.
So you’re attracted to narcissists or you’re in a relationship with a narcissists, what can you about it:
1. Forgive yourself – don’t go inward and blame yourself.
2. Assess your relationship and how you’re treated.
3. Look at the 7 relationship hopes and realities and see where you are along these spectrums.

Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.

He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:

Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders: A New Conceptualization of Development, Reinforcement, Expression, and Treatment. Available at: https://www.drdfox.com/books

The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Available at: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1

Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): https://goo.gl/BLRkFy

Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Silver Award Winner):: https://goo.gl/sZYhym

The Clinician’s Guide to Diagnosis and Treatment of Personality Disorders: https://goo.gl/ZAVe9v

Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).

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Dr. Fox’s website: http://www.drdfox.com/
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Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox

Videos edited by Emil Christopher: [email protected]

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