THE FATHER WOUND (Types): PAPA TRAUMA/"DADDY ISSUES"

"Papa Trauma," is a word I use to describe the wounds we have from our fathers or father role/figures in our lives. It's the first video in a series about the wounds and difficulties we can experience via our fathers.

This video explores the often over-lapping, but varied ways, we can experience difficulty or pain within the relationships we had or have with our fathers, based upon the way they showed up or not - in our childhoods.

In an ideal situation, we have two (not perfect) but generally available, stable and loving parents. However, in many families, one or both parents might enable, disengage, abandon, reject, wound, etc....

"Papa Trauma," is the result of chronic, interpersonal trauma in childhood with our fathers and often extending into adulthood, as a result of our father's own challenges, like Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder (or traits), other PD's, substance abuse, mental illness, or other types of parental challenges and wounds, traumas, etc.

While those who struggle with these disorders deserve deep compassion and empathy, so do the children of these parents who had no power in their childhoods to manage parents who were often some combination of:

wounding, abandoning, fear inducing, addicted, chaotic, unavailable, shaming, blaming, scary, highly conditional or highly critical, unsupportive and/or who fostered a sense that love always hurts or love always leaves, and that it's "normal" for love and hate to co-exist in how we feel about our fathers, or to believe that "all men are _____," or "all mean leave, or all men don't know how to show up for their partners and children, or all men enable unstable partners, etc"

At the core, Papa Trauma (like Mama Trauma) can make us feel we are unworthy, unlovable, and that trust and safety are not possible or attainable in relationships.

**I did not add abusive fathers in this video (but I will address in detail in other videos).

xo

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Dr. Kim Sage