Jimmy Kimmel TRUTH BOMB: WARTORN CHICAGO AND PORTLAND IN RUINS

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Governor JB Pritzker just walked through Chicago like it was a war zone — except the “devastation” looked suspiciously like brunch with bad parking. In this satirical report, we dive into the so-called liberal apocalypse where the streets are filled with jazz, lattes, and Labradoodles.

Jon Stewart-style commentary meets full-blown absurdity as our correspondent “survives” the chaos of Downtown Chicago's brunch wars, the gluten-free muffin shortages, and the uprising at the farmers market led by suburban dads named Greg. If this is the end of democracy, it smells like fair-trade coffee and avocado toast.

☕ Watch as we unpack the “collapse of society” one oat milk latte at a time.
🎙️ Reporting live from the mean streets of democracy— this is Simple News.

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