Who do YOU enjoy being alive for? 🥰

We all live our lives connected to others. Sometimes that’s not a great thing and drives us crazy! But most of us have people in our lives that we really ENJOY BEING ALIVE FOR.

As I reflect on this question, writing this caption after recording the vlog, it makes me think that I’ve forgotten the other half of the equation.

Besides thinking of people whose presence in our lives brings us pleasure and enjoyment, pride and gratitude… there are also a whole bunch of other people whom we enjoy being OURSELVES for for them.

As a parent, I don’t just enjoy my children’s aliveness in my life, but even though it gets gritty and tough at times (don’t we all know that!!), and it certainly can be the last thing from being “pleasurable” or “enjoyable” in the moment when everyone is losing it with each other, or there’s some cause for worry or stress…

If we look carefully at the experience, even when times are hard and the going is tough - even devastating - we CAN still enjoy being there for the people in our lives. I’ll speak for myself - there is a quiet, stubborn kind of joy that comes from being there, being alive for xyz person even when things aren’t exactly happy, that I’M proud of, I’M grateful I can be there for.

Yes, even if I can’t stand this person. My presence in their lives means something net-positive. I bring them something that no one else can.

Even if they won’t admit it ever. But I can mindfully and self-compassionately allow myself a sweet private moment of enjoyment. That I am this kind of person who shows up and makes a positive difference, and whether the receiving end knows it, appreciates it, or shows it or not…. *I* know and *I’m* going to let it matter to ME.

I digress. :) I hope this little exercise feeds and nourishes you, and seasons your week ahead with some warmth, sweetness, and appreciation for yourself and the meaningful others in your lives whom you really “enjoy being alive for.”

Who came up in your mind while doing this? Share your experiences in the comments below! I had lots crowding into my mind in just 5 minutes! And I am feeling just overflowing with warmth and love and gratitude and determination right now.

PS. Here’s a little about my beloved (and slightly intimidating!) psychology and personal tutor at St Hilda’s College, Oxford, Dr Jane Mellanby. I really do continue to enjoy being alive, including my ongoing music-making - she never failed to attend my recitals as a college Instrumental Scholar, with a bouquet in hand - for her and what she saw and encouraged in me, and lived out with her own extraordinary life as living example.
https://www.thetimes.com/uk/obituarie...
https://cherwell.org/2008/05/23/final...