SpaZm - Rip My Heart Out

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SpaZm - Rip My Heart Out

[Lyrics]

It's time to rip my f*ckin heart out
Wonder where I'll start now
Ponder my care, will depart the heart loud
Loved so much, impaired, lost & not found

Ex's in my head, dead connections, yet still possessive
Hit the ego hard, fed my misconceptions
Still my p*ssy, take my sloppy seconds
My god I'm a d*ck, did I learn my lesson?

Had thoughts like this on the regular
No wonder I was drove so far from her
Listened to the pain & let the times turn
All this hate and resentment I surely earned

Why do we think this way?
Become so jealous when we see life at play
Turned my head, walked away, over and over, still I blame
One with the dead, burn in the dread, lover and hater gone insane

Broke through my ego, found my soul
Took my pride, lost control
Seen all along I was such a fool
Had to go back to my mental school

Rewired it all, took my heart that was broken in pieces
Stitched it back together with the soul's releases
I was guided but wouldn't listen, mind kept leavin
Was so stubborn, missin the point, kept grievin

Pain so bad, I'm still learnin to deal
Facin it daily so some day I can heal
Mother hurt me, dad's love was concealed
Ex's pushed me, yet realize it's what I made real

I was meant for it, for when this time would come
I could rise up fully, no more fighting for fun
Lost in my pride, love I couldn't find, on the run for some feelin but came undone
I'd come to my moment, bind the hurt into song, deals the same but this way a new cycle is begun

Not dark enough, F*ck all these pieces of sh*t who made life rough
Corruption fed through a fake system, ya'll are out of luck
Parked in the center, can't do sh*t to me, brains sucked
Can't kill me, Can't stop me, Can't compete, believe the end is near, drown em in the flood

Mud stained brain, Sane or not, all the same, still show who's really to blame
I was bred on rage, the freak train, lost in the wrong lane, lead to a man untamed
Open minded enough to read the sacred page, caged in, insane again, can't buy me with fame my friend
Attend their funeral just to salute the end, enraged pen, tie em down, the game comin to an end

Rip my heart out and stomp on it
Dip my part into lies and watch me overcome and rise to the top of it
Insist you rip me into the abyss, It's made me unstoppable in this sh*t
Persist until you lose grip from your fist, got a list to expose, time to admit

Uninstall all the crap, hop skip & a jump from the dirt nap
Equipped all needed to snap, chop - flip - contort that trap
Spaz on the track, nap, flip back, snort the facts
Line after line of wisdom, listen perhaps

Reprogram the feed, to give me what I need to proceed & breathe
Conceive of ideas beyond comprehension for those to hear when ready, indeed
Smoke gram after gram, tension snapped, they see the wound that bleeds
Toked into smoke, lost in this land bein reclaimed by the seed

Heart still broken, the heart still bleeds but it feeds me the power to rise n be free
Lost still tokin, depart the eyes who can't see, each has a path of their own, not all will lead
One with the sphinx, even when broken I protect the eastern gate, one part of the breed
Son of the real link, not jokin, inject the truth, so the world don't sink, real ones achieve

Talk to the lord, The true being of supreme balance of masculine & feminine
Guides me to the board, make moves of a true kind, rekindle the balance within
Walk with the sword, the bold stand for the war, mended into warriors inside
In hidin, waitin for the right time to strike, bored with their fake a** pride

Hated that I was abandoned as a child
Left me to fend for myself in the wild
Several times put on trial
The wreckage of life continued to pile

Why plan to hurt me so much?
Why intend to crush me with every punch?
Why lend a hand to push me off the edge? was too much
Why bend me into your evil rush?

I cared, I dared to walk there, I spared you more than I care to share
Drinkin endlessly, drownin in tears, so impaired
Scared for my life, lost all that mattered, no one found here
Smeared my name, once thought you could be it then the truth appeared

So many drugs, feared a real hug, hurt I'd see even when I'd receive love
Didn't match above & below, didn't go with the flow then greeted by the white dove
Spoke to me, plugged me into the current, soul burnin, thought "what have I done?"
Couldn't catch up for awhile, worshipped my pain as they marked me in the file, think i'm gone?

"He's too lost", "He's too buried", rose from my grave in a hurry
Awoke from my coma, facin my trauma, learnin for the real diploma, so sorry
The aroma of truth, tracin the OM sound now, lost but now found, finishin the story
At what cost did you rip apart my heart? Now you've awakened the one that'll face you, real glory




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