Sci-fi’s Greatest Hits, #55: We Have Failed song from "Jack the Giant Killer".

"We Have Failed". Music by Moose Charlap, lyrics by Sandy Stewart, produced by Edwin Picker.

Found in the musical version of "Jack the Giant Killer" (1962 - Zenith Pictures, distributed by United Artists).

I'm being purposely vague about this selection's title because I have no idea what it or its accompanying musical numbers happen to be called officially. I don't know who wrote them or who's doing the singing, either, or even if the data is available anywhere. The categories will have to remain empty until better information comes along.

The 1962 fantasy picture "Jack the Giant Killer" is an odd case. Reportedly, producer Edward Small was impressed with the success of Columbia Pictures' "The 7th Voyage of Sinbad" (famed for Ray Harryhausen's masterful and extremely popular stop-motion animation effects) and wanted one of his own. To that end, he hired 7th Voyage's director, Nathan Juran, as well as two of its principal stars, Kerwin Mathews and Torin Thatcher, in hopes that lightning would strike twice. The resulting movie was apparently too similar to its inspiration, as Columbia threatened to sue Small. The producer hastily reworked the property by awkwardly jamming in a bunch of musical numbers to emphasize the difference. These songs, which had to play over existing footage, work about as smoothly as you'd expect; the regular, rhythmic quality of sung verse clashes against the spoken dialogue template, a discipline which makes use of dramatic pauses and changes in tempo for naturalistic effect or dramatic emphasis. The problem is particularly apparent in this 'We Have Failed' selection... the vocalists' warbling has to meander all over the place in order to stay in sync with the pre-existing lip movements. It's easy to mock, but in a way, you have to admire the insane balls it takes to attempt a remedy this extreme. That it sounds asinine is almost beside the point. Yeah... almost.

For this presentation, I've provided three versions of the same scene, one after the other in succession: the first presents the scene as it was originally shot, followed by the song-added version, followed in turn by my Greatest Hits treatment with altered visuals playing alongside the song. It was once possible to find the whole musical cut online, but I don't see it around anymore. Fortunately (or not, depending on how grating you find these things), some of the songs are still around individually and I plan to adapt one or two more. This film still has plenty of keen footage to exploit!

Update 12-21-2025. A big thank you to coridrasin3979 for bringing Morris Isaac Charlap (better recognized through his nickname, "Moose" Charlap) to our attenton! Charlap, along with lyricist Sandy Stewart and producer Ewin Picker, cobbled together all the wild musical numbers that were added to "Jack the Giant Killer"! Those interested in more details are encouraged to consult an exhaustive write-up from the April 2007 online version of Tim Lucas's Video Watchdog: (https://videowatchdogblog.blogspot.com/ 2007/04/jack-singing-giant-killer.html) . Remove the gap to find the article. It contains all the info on the topic you could ever want (almost all, anyway. I'll still don't know who's doing the singing).