Relationship Style of the ISTJ (Stabilizer)

Does your partner stare at you like a deer in the headlights when you ask them how they feel? Do you have to insist you help them because they want to do everything themselves? Do they withdraw in silent confusion when you get upset with them, not really understanding why you have to be emotional?

Then you won’t want to miss this episode of Relationship Live to find out why the ISTJ behaves this way!

Everything you ever wanted to know about what drives their need to follow all of their many rules and shoulds on how to be a good spouse. You’ll find out why those in a relationship with the ISTJ start having a life separate from their ISTJ partner who only seems interested in doing their own thing except when you remind, nag and push them to.

If you’re in a relationship with an ISTJ, you know how hard they work to make their home safe and sound, take care of money and comply with rules, roles and everything else they believe they should organize. They wait to be told what to do so they can comply, make sure they do things correctly and never get in trouble from you, quickly turning the relationship into parent/child. This approach to relationships means they can maintain the comfort of their "inner cave" where they are safe from rejection, abandonment, and disapproval. We’re going to give you a few ideas about how you can get them to open up, start sharing a little and feel more secure in your relationship. This allows you to get your needs met in your relationship with your ISTJ.

Not only will you learn what makes them tick, you’ll find out why…

• it’s so hard for them to communicate, and why you have to pry everything out of them
• they let you lead and wait for you to tell them what to do
• they freak out if you blindside them or ask them to change their routine
• it’s so hard for them to say no or assert themselves
• it’s sometimes easier to let them do things for you than confront them

Best of all, we’ll explain what their predominant need is, why it creates challenges in relationships when they ignore their own needs to take care of you. You’ll also see how their need to be secure causes them to focus more on doing things for you than sharing themselves with you.

To maintain a healthy relationship with an ISTJ, it's crucial to accept and appreciate them for who they are. Trying to change or force them out of their comfort zone is not productive and can cause additional frustration. Just because they may not express their emotions as openly as other personality types, it doesn't mean their love and commitment is any less strong.