Stop Trying to “Bounce Back” (Do This Instead)

Have you ever looked at your life after having kids and thought, “Why don’t I feel like myself anymore?”
Even though everything looks “fine” on the outside?

This video is for the moms who feel lost after postpartum — not dramatically, not visibly — but quietly.

In this video, I talk about:
• Why so many moms feel disconnected after having children
• The identity shift of motherhood (matrescence)
• Why gratitude doesn't cancel out grief
• The "Bounce Back" myth keeping you stuck
• How to stop asking "How do I go back?" and start asking "Who am I becoming?"
• What actually helped me reconnect with myself (without pressure or perfection)

This isn’t about fixing yourself or rushing into a new version of who you are. It’s about understanding what’s happening — and giving yourself permission to be in process.

If you’re in a season where joy feels muted, motivation feels gone, or the old version of you doesn’t quite fit anymore… there is nothing wrong with you. You’re not broken. You’re becoming.

🤍
And if this feeling ever starts to feel heavy, persistent, or like too much to carry alone, reaching out for professional or personal support can be a really kind next step.

Thank you for being here.

Timestamps:
00:00 – Why I Don’t Feel Like Myself Anymore
00:42 – The Quiet Postpartum Struggle
02:28 – Matrescence: The Identity Shift No One Talks About
03:06 – “I Feel Off” — Why This Isn’t Always Depression
04:10 – What’s Actually Happening in Your Brain After Birth
07:41 – The “Bounce Back” Myth and Why Gratitude Doesn’t Cancel Grief
09:42 – Asking “Who Am I Becoming?” Instead
10:50 – How I Reconnected (Without Pressure)
12:42 – You Are Not Broken

Sources & Further Reading:
This video references peer-reviewed research and expert work on matrescence, postpartum brain changes, hormones, sleep deprivation, mental load, and identity shifts in motherhood.

• Hoekzema et al. (2017), Nature Neuroscience — Pregnancy-related brain changes
• Alexandra Sacks, MD — Matrescence & identity transition into motherhood
• Brummelte & Galea (2016), Frontiers in Neuroendocrinology — Postpartum hormones & mood
• Insana et al. (2013), Sleep — Sleep deprivation & cognitive fog in new mothers
• Daminger (2019), American Sociological Review — Mental load & cognitive labor
• Doka (2002) — Disenfranchised grief & identity loss
• Deci & Ryan (2000) — Identity rebuild through small, repeated actions

**This video reflects personal experience and publicly available research and is not medical advice.