E17: Deconstructing Gaslighting: What Is It, Really?

Gaslighting after betrayal can make you question your memory, your emotions, and your reality — and that confusion is not weakness. It’s a trauma response.

In this episode of Ask The Betrayed, Rae sits down with gaslighting specialist and CORE Relationship Recovery team member Sarah Morales (SarahMoralesCoaching.com) to break down what gaslighting actually is, why it’s so damaging after infidelity, and how betrayed partners can reclaim clarity and self-trust.

Sarah shares her framework for identifying gaslighting behaviors without getting trapped in the endless question: “Did they mean to?” You’ll learn why gaslighting doesn’t always come from narcissism, how shame can drive gaslighting patterns, and the difference between gaslighting vs. a gaslighting attempt — a powerful shift that restores agency and reduces self-doubt.

We also discuss:
✅ The most common question betrayed partners ask: “Was that gaslighting?”
✅ Sarah’s core definition that helps you answer that question
✅ Why gaslighting produces deep self-doubt and loss of self-trust
✅ What is Self-gaslighting?
✅ The red flags of internalized manipulation
✅ Unfaithful partners: discerning between intention vs impact — and how gaslighting blocks repair
✅ Practical hope: how healing reduces gaslighting behaviors over time

If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe I am too much” or “Maybe I’m crazy,” - you're not - and this episode is for you.

✨Where to find Sarah and take her courses:
Listen to her podcast: Deconstructing Gaslighting (2 seasons / 50+ episodes)
For Courses, visit: https://www.sarahmoralescoaching.com/ → Deconstructing Gaslighting Academy TM (https://www.sarahmoralescoaching.com/...)

Please note: "Deconstructing Gaslighting" is a Trademark (TM) of Sarah Morales and may not be used without express permission

💬 How have you been gaslighted? Please leave a comment below - we'd love to hear from you

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Join Sharon and Rae every two weeks for grounded, empathetic conversations about healing after betrayal, rebuilding your identity, strengthening your voice, and reclaiming your life.

Please share this episode with someone rebuilding clarity after betrayal trauma.

📬 If you have questions you'd like us to answer in an episode, or would like to inquire about coaching with Rae or therapy help, including intensives, with Sharon and James, please reach out to us at: AskTheBetrayed@gmail.com

🎧 You can also find us on Apple, Spotify, and everywhere podcasts are found.

🔗 Need help healing? Find James & Sharon at the CORE Relationship Recovery website: www.HopeForUs.com (Email: Info@HopeForUs.com ) or find Rae at www.HealingTalksBack.com (Email: Rae@HealingTalksBack.com )

Our Website: https://www.AskTheBetrayed.com

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