Hysterical Maid of Honor Parody Song Speech

My "speech" at my sisters wedding! Congrats to Taylor and Alex!

LYRICS:

Let me tell you a tale
Of my sister named Taylor
What a princess, who would always be right by my side

She didn't date many guys
No one lived up to her standards
But when Bob is your father, you don't tend to compromise

But then came Match!
A new fantastic profile
Of a guy named Alex
That my mom catfished
And they went on a first date

To an Irish Pub!
And this time something felt brand new
Oh wow she likes this guy!
They'll give it a try
And now she's in this whole new thing with him....

Now they're going strong
Moved in, and still get along
They start adopting dogs they find anywhere

Yahtzee and playing bags
Now they sell weed for my dad
But hey its medicine, who are we to care

There's something that needs to be said
Alex farted on my head
I only wish that I knew that night
it'd go on and on and on and on

Strangers no more
Alex is now part of the family
His soft side, watches musical all night

Taylor....Alex
A strange match made in heaven
Drinking the beer Nati Light

Tell me something Zick
Are you happy on this cold dry land?
Or do you need more?
Is there water that you're searching for
He's sailing
But on the sea, he feels alone
Longing for love
But on the surface, he wishes he dove

Tell me something Tay
Aren't you tired staying in the bay?
Or do you need more?
Ain't it hard keeping' it on the shore?
She's diving
In all the good times, she finds herself descending, with him
And soon they both love PADI and say

We sure love scuba, breath through a tube-a
We're both dive certified
Be my dive captain
Lets make love happen
I'll marry you at high tide

In the shallow, shaaaaloww
In the shallow sha low low lowwwws
In the shallow, shaaaalows
They'll marry at high tide now

Ahhh ahhhhhhhh ahhhh ahhhhh ahhhhhhh

Soon they'll be married
you know they're story
They'll say their wedding vows
Have a big service, with friends and family
They're nearly Kozicki's now

In the boathouse, boathouse
In the boathouse boat house house house
In the boathouse boathouse
They're nearly Kozicki's now

I hopped off the plane at OKC
With my dress and a bear costume
Welcome to the wedding of my sis (woah)
Hey did you see that groom?

Walked down the aisle, here we are for the first time
Look to my right, and I see the groomsmens line
This is all so crazy
My little sisters getting married
My speech is coming and I'm suffering from stage fright
Too much pressure and I'm nervous
Thats when they bears came on the stagey-o
And now my song is done, and now my song is done
And now my song - it's done!
So you put your hands up and dance to this song and party with Al and Tay
Downing your drinks like yeah
Dancing to songs like yeah
You put your hands up I'm ending this song
They'll never forget this day (yeahhhh)
It's the wedding of Al and Tay (yeahhhhh)
It's the wedding of Al and Tay