Start Putting Yourself First: Tools to Say No Without Guilt or Drama | The Mel Robbins Podcast

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In this episode, you are going to learn how to put yourself first.

Being a #peoplepleaser is a coping mechanism and it is destroying your energy, your time, your #dreams, and your sanity.

Every time you say yes to something you don’t really want to do, you’re saying no to yourself.

Today, we’re changing that in a surprising way.

Learn the science-backed tools you need to break the habit of always putting other people’s needs before your own.

Xo Mel

In this episode, you'll learn:
00:00 Intro
02:23 What the heck IS people-pleasing anyway?
06:07 I bet you can relate to Janet who learned this message as a kid.
07:12 Let’s just get the bad news about guilt out of the way.
08:38 Because here is some good news about guilt!
11:03 What does a pool table have to do with people-pleasing?
16:38 I still cringe when I think of this phone call with my father.
26:35 What happens when your friends don’t like the “new you”?
27:52 At the heart of people-pleasing is this.
28:38 This research explains why we avoid discomfort.
30:23 Think people-pleasing is about others? Think again.
32:28 The surprising advice for how to handle disappointment from others.
34:30 What if your lifestyle is now different from your friends?
39:06 Please stop looking here for validation as you change your life.
42:51 Do this to start figuring out who you really are.
45:46 Do this next time you’re asked to do something you don’t want to do.
47:20 Here’s how my friend Amy reacted when I had to bail on her at dinner in Vegas.
52:39 This is what happens every time you start to say no.

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