Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake (Part 10: FINAL) | Gray Fox, Big Boss, Ending

You know, Metal Gear 2 is a masterpiece. Kojima weaves Cold War paranoia, doomed romance, and the existential horror of being a soldier into a game that came out on the MSX of all things. And yet… here I am, forced to watch Damian and Neil stumble through the finale like two clowns who accidentally wandered into a Shakespeare play.

The Gray Fox fight — an emotionally charged duel between brothers in arms — reduced to playground commentary about getting punched in the “left nut” and arguing over who botched the save file. Instead of tension, we get Damian whining that the game “juked” him while Neil plays color commentator like it’s a backyard wrestling show. This was supposed to be the tragic farewell to Gustava’s doomed lover, not open-mic night at a dive bar.

And Big Boss. Dear god, Big Boss. His monologues about war, mercenaries, and the endless cycle of conflict are some of the best writing in early gaming. But what do these two do? Mock his dialogue, crack Sean Connery impressions so bad they should be a war crime, and somehow segue into a rant about not eating dinner. Nothing kills gravitas like whining about leftovers while the greatest villain in video game history explains the philosophy of perpetual war.

By the time the ending rolled around, with Snake and Holly escaping on the chopper, any emotional weight was buried under layers of nonsense: rope sound effects, fart jokes, and Damian refusing to use a gun because… reasons. Kojima gave us an ending about the futility of war and the burden of soldiers. 2FP gave us arguments about chocolate rations and half-assed Disney impressions.

So yes, Metal Gear 2 is still brilliant. But watching 2FP play it is like watching two raccoons brawl inside a priceless violin. Entertaining in its own chaotic way, but an insult to the instrument.

Final verdict: The game is five stars. The players? Zero.

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