WHY DID I BUY THIS??? || A Clever Way to Cover Stains

I had instant buyer's remorse when I brought this home. It is U-G-L-Y!!!!

All three rows of drawers have various degrees of beveling. Why??? And because of this, there's no way to get away from using a bijillion pieces of hardware. And whoever painted it before I bought it made a humongous mess with the paint! Ugh! After 1-1/2 years of being uninspired, I was ready to sell it as is for $15 just to get rid of it. It was Kevin that said, "No, let me work on it for you." And so he did. But then we discovered stains in the bare wood that wouldn't sand away.

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