I'm Still Searching

I wish I could believe
But nothing answers back
I grew up learning how to doubt
Every promise stripped for parts
I watched gods turn into ghosts
Under hospital lights and dark
They said trust what you can’t see
All I see is consequence
If there’s a hand above this place
Why does it never intervene
I don’t hate the idea of faith
I hate that I can’t feel it
I’m staring straight at the edge
Still asking if it’s real
If there’s a god he’s watching me break
I want to believe this isn’t the end
I’m still reaching through the dark
Say something
Before I fall apart
The world keeps eating its young
Calling it necessary pain
Every screen sells salvation
With a price tag and a name
I’m not asking for a miracle
Just a reason not to drown
If faith is more than survival
Why does it feel like backing down
I’ve memorized the questions
I’ve buried every prayer
If hope is something learned
Why was it never there
I’m still reaching through the dark
Say something
Before I fall apart
I’m still reaching through the dark
Say something
Before I fall apart
I wish I could believe
But nothing answers back