Why Avoidants Become Worse After They HEAL | Megan Weks

In this powerful deep-dive, dating and relationship expert Megan Weks exposes a critical, often overlooked trap in modern attachment theory work. Many with avoidant attachment styles embark on a journey of self-discovery—reading the books, going to therapy, learning the language—and believe they have healed. But something sinister happens: instead of becoming more capable of intimacy, they become more defended. They don't transform into security; they transform into avoidance with a vocabulary.

This video explores the tragedy of the "supposedly healed avoidant," who mistakes intellectual understanding for emotional transformation. We'll uncover how therapeutic language is weaponized to justify emotional unavailability, how awareness without behavioral change creates a false confidence, and why this state is often more damaging and permanent than their original unconscious patterns. If you've ever been confused by a partner who sounds incredibly self-aware but acts consistently distant, this is essential viewing.

Megan Weks is a renowned dating coach and the creator of The Manfunnel Method®, featured in Forbes, Psychology Today, and The New York Times. She specializes in helping women navigate modern dating with strategy and self-worth.

📑 Chapters / Timestamps:
0:00 - The "Healed" Avoidant Paradox 🤔
2:15 - Knowledge Without Transformation: The Core Problem
6:40 - The Weaponization of Therapy Language ⚔️
12:10 - False Confidence & Intellectual Superiority
16:30 - New Justifications for Old Patterns 🔄
20:50 - The Devastating Impact on Partners
23:45 - The Path to Actual Healing vs. Pseudo-Healing 🌱


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This video is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The content discusses psychological patterns and relationships but does not constitute therapeutic advice. Always seek the advice of your qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding a psychological or medical condition.