GAME OVER

game over man.

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There’s a million different games out there for you to pick up and play right now. From roguelikes to idle games, colorful excel spreadsheets and interactive movies, to everything in-between, there have never been more games to play and die in, in absurd ways. What Possibly made you think you could survive a fall from that high up? Have you tried NOT shooting a rocket launcher directly at your feet? And I’m not sure if you knew this but you NEED TO LEVEL ADP.

As long as video games have existed, they’ve ended, that sounds really dramatic but they’ve at least at some point stopped you from going forward. In a game like super mario sunshine, which is a linear platformer where you go either from area to area or level to level. At a certain point developers need a way to tell you to stop, because games don’t go on forever, it’s not like there’s a developer on the other side of the screen watching you play the pachinko level and secretly working on 25 more for you to play. In Super Mario Sunshine you get told to stop all the time, like natural barriers surrounding the map, and invisible walls.

In other games, these hold true as well, but you might be stopped in different ways, like a required boss fight (elden ring), or a mechanic you don’t have access to because you haven’t completed a certain quest (rock chocobo ff7 rebirth). Pokemon is infamous for it’s roadblocks, which is basically just a fancy invisible wall that has some dialogue. In black and white you have to deal with being stopped because these random people are busy dancing. The one that personally infuriates me the most is sword and shield’s first roadblock, which are these wooloo that are sleeping, and thus i’m forced to move 3 feet to the right instead to get around them. Like, yes, I want to wake these stupid wooloo up, HONK HONK, WAKE UP!!!!!