I Can't Love You the Way You Want Me To: Couple Dilemma | Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

On this week's episode of Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel:  Their relationship is on the edge. They're grappling with communication issues and the emotional scars from their past. And they're trapped. Trapped in an endless cycle of blame, defensiveness, and attack. Esther tries to help them notice their patterns of escalation and break the cycle they keep finding themselves in.

Chapters
00:00 Introduction
00:52 The Session Begins
02:11 The Couple's Dilemma
03:46 Acknowledging Efforts and Misunderstandings
06:11 Exploring Past Conflicts
14:40 Revisiting Childhood and Its Impact
23:35 The Philadelphia Fight
27:43 Setting the Stage for Conflict
28:22 Escalation and Personalization
29:10 Impact on the Child
30:02 Addressing the Adults
31:24 Control and Resentment
32:55 Emotional Disconnect
33:52 Seeking Validation
34:37 Fear of Vulnerability
35:28 Patterns of Behavior
47:09 Conditional Love
49:05 Breaking the Cycle
57:31 Final Reflections

About Where Should We Begin?:
Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others.

About Esther Perel:
Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com or by following @EstherPerelOfficial on Instagram.