How Autistic Women Shrink in Romantic Relationships

In this video, I’m talking about the subtle, often invisible ways autistic women shrink themselves inside romantic relationships and how easily it can happen without anyone explicitly asking us to.

This isn’t about blaming yourself or vilifying partners. It’s about naming patterns that many autistic women recognize only in hindsight: masking, over-accommodating, and slowly losing access to our own wants, needs, and sensory limits in order to preserve connection.

If you’ve ever found yourself becoming “easier,” quieter, or more flexible at the cost of your own internal reality, this video is for you.

You’re not too much.
And you don’t owe your body, your comfort, or your nervous system to anyone.

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Timestamps
(1:34) Topic overview
(1:37) How masking shows up in relationships
(3:14) Searching for reasons we’re the problem
(5:01) Over-empathizing with a partner
(6:41) Losing track of wants and needs
(8:08) Over-accommodating
(9:11) Enduring uncomfortable social situations
(9:35) Overwriting our own experiences
(13:00) Changing personal interests
(14:18) Downplaying discomfort with physical touch
(16:55) Hiding sensory overload

#audhd #autism #autisminrelationships