"I Took a Standard Combat Scan — The Instructor Asked Who Authorized a 'Founder-Level Human'"
Автор: Sci-Fi Short Stories
Загружено: 2026-01-12
Просмотров: 3343
I just wanted a student ID. Instead, I got fifteen plasma rifles pointed at my chest and an Admiral telling me I’d crashed the galactic internet just by existing. Apparently, to the rest of the galaxy, being human means you’re either a god or a glitch—and they aren't sure which is scarier.
🧠 The Human Perspective: Humans are biological anomalies due to Toxin-Seeking Behavior and High-Gravity Durability. What we consider "flavor" (like capsaicin in peppers) is a sophisticated chemical defense designed to kill, yet we consume it for fun—a trait that, combined with our dense skeletal structure, makes us appear as indestructible "Founder-level" entities to species from softer worlds.
🚀 What's Inside: • 🌶️ [The Biohazard Burrito] How a routine spicy lunch was flagged as an intentional consumption of lethal toxins. • 🦴 [The "God" Scan] A simple childhood bike accident is reinterpreted by alien scanners as "surviving total structural failure." • 💻 [The Logic Cascade] The hilarious moment human DNA data proves so "impossible" that it crashes the entire galactic banking and dating networks.
⭐ Why Sci-Fi Fans Love This: This is the quintessential "Death Worlder" HFY story. It highlights the massive, comedic gap between our self-perception as "squishy humans" and the terrifying reality of our biology when compared to a delicate galaxy.
👇 Fuel the Channel: 👍 Like if humans rule! 💬 Comment your favorite part! 🔔 Subscribe for daily Sci-Fi epics!
#HFY #SciFiShortStory #HumanityFuckYeah #DeathWorlders #AlienPOV #ScienceFiction #SpaceOpera #FounderLevel #BiologicalAnomaly #ShortStories
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