can't play that chord

my original demo song...

CAN’T PLAY THAT CHORD
[Verse 1]
Band’s tuned up, crowd’s feelin’ right,We’ve played this song a thousand nights.But here it comes… that dreaded line…Where the chord I hate is next in line.Drummer counts four, bass man grins—And my left hand screams, “Oh hell, not again!”

[Chorus]
’Cause I can’t play that chord—My fingers won’t bend, my pinky’s on strike.I can shred all day on the stuff I like…But THAT one shape? Lord, my hand gets floored!Yeah, every song is smooth as silk…Until we hit that chord… and it sounds like spilled milk!No matter how hard I try, good Lord—I just can’t… play… that chord!

[Verse 2]
Guitar tab swore it wasn’t hard,But it feels like Twister on a fretboard.The singer shoots me a side-eye glare,Crowd leans in… waitin’ for the nightmare.We reach the spot where I always choke—Drummer whispers, “Don’t screw this up, bro.”

[Chorus]
’Cause I can’t play that chord—My fingers revolt like a union strike.Sounds like two cats fighting on a motorbike!Everything’s rockin’… until the train gets gored.I’m a six-string king ’til THAT shape appears…Then I’m cryin’, sweatin’, cussin’ through tears!Yeah, heaven help this poor ol’ lord—I just can’t… play… that chord!

Breakdown (spoken / ad-libs)
Guitarist: “Aw hell—NOPE. That ain’t it.”Guitarist: “WHAT IN THE—!? Who designed this stupid chord!?”Guitarist: “You know what? Y’all can play it. I QUIT.”

[Final Chorus]
He can’t play that chord—We even slowed it down, made the bar real wide.We charted it out like a kiddie guide…But his hand still folds like an old clipboard!Yeah, maybe one day he'll conquer that beast…But tonight the chord wins—he’s deceased!Give him a beer and a mercy award…For the man who just…Can’t… play… that… chord!