Community with Covenant-Keeping LGBT Saints | An Interview with Jenn Curtis

Jenn Curtis is the president of North Star, an organization dedicated to supporting LGBT Latter-day Saints. With a lifelong commitment to the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Jenn has navigated her own journey of self-discovery and faith, advocating for understanding and compassion within the Church community. She has been actively involved in creating resources and spaces for dialogue around LGBT issues and faith, helping individuals reconcile their identities with their beliefs.

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This podcast conversation centers on Jenn's personal journey with same-sex attraction, her experiences within the church, and the importance of community and understanding in navigating these complex issues.

Key Insights:

Personal Journey: Jenn shares her experience of coming to terms with her same-sex attraction while married, emphasizing the internal struggles and the process of self-discovery.

Community Support: The North Star community provides a safe space for LGBT individuals and their families, fostering open dialogue and understanding about faith and sexuality.

Curiosity Over Judgment: Jenn highlights the importance of curiosity in conversations about LGBT issues, suggesting that church leaders should ask questions and seek to understand rather than make assumptions.

Covenant Path: The discussion emphasizes that North Star promotes a gospel-centered approach, encouraging members to strive to keep their covenants while navigating their identities.

Tension in Faith: Jenn acknowledges the tension many LGBT individuals feel between their faith and their sexual orientation, advocating for a compassionate and understanding approach from church leaders.

Leadership Applications:

Foster Open Dialogue: Leaders can create environments where members feel safe to discuss their struggles and questions about faith and sexuality without fear of judgment.

Encourage Curiosity: Leaders should practice curiosity by asking open-ended questions to better understand the experiences of LGBT members, which can help reduce fear and stigma.

Promote Inclusivity: By recognizing the diverse experiences within their congregations, leaders can work towards creating a more inclusive community that supports all members in their faith journeys.

00:00:06 - Introduction to North Star's Covenant-Focused Mission
Leading Saints introduces North Star, an independent advocate for LGBT Latter-day Saints who are striving to keep their covenants. The annual conference is highly recommended for all Church leaders.

00:02:52 - Jenn Curtis's Personal Journey and Divine Confirmation
Jenn shares her story of realizing she was same-sex attracted 18 years into her marriage. A pivotal moment in prayer led to a spiritual confirmation: "What do you think?" This helped her fully embrace her reality.

00:10:59 - Curiosity: The Antidote for Shame and Fear
Jenn describes the shame and disorientation of her discovery. Leadership Takeaway: Curiosity is the key to ministry. Leaders should ask sincere, open questions instead of making assumptions to create a "soft landing place."

00:15:47 - Marriage is a Daily Choice of Commitment
Jenn and her husband navigate their marriage by actively choosing their relationship every day. She stresses that this commitment, while facing unique challenges, requires constant, honest conversation.

00:24:04 - Finding Community: Overcoming the Wall of Shame
Jenn needed a community that affirmed both her faith and her temple covenants. She describes her first North Star conference as walking through a "wall of shame" into a "wall of love" and spiritual connection.

00:37:40 - North Star's Gospel-Centered Approach in the Tension
North Star is distinct because it is fundamentally covenant-focused. It helps members stand in the uncomfortable "tension" between same-sex attraction and the Plan of Happiness, seeking reconciliation through Christ.

00:45:14 - The Power of Choice and Alignment with God
Jenn found liberation in realizing she has choice over her feelings, allowing her to align with God's stated plan. This choice-centered approach brings lasting happiness now, not just in the next life.

00:58:38 - Practical Takeaway: Be a Resource Hub
The most impactful leadership role is providing resources. Leaders should immediately direct members to North Star's vetted online communities, videos, and FAQs. Jenn highlights a bishop who focused on her relationship with God, allowing other issues to "sort themselves out."

01:08:46 - Final Plea: Be Willing to Learn and Connect
Leaders should be willing to learn and engage. Jenn felt a powerful connection with her bishop when he was humble enough to call his own gay sister for insight, demonstrating a sincere willingness to learn and connect on a human level.