Joe Hawley - Your Mother is a Basketball (LYRICS)

"Your Mother is a Basketball" by Joe Hawley.
From the album "Joe Hawley Joe Hawley".

Original song:    • Joe Hawley -  VI. Your Mother is a Basketball  
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/2FknKh...
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Background video:    • NBA 2K20 Gameplay (PS4 HD) [1080p60FPS]  

LYRICS:

Your mother's so fat they didn't call Ghostbusters
Stay Puft Man was all, "I don't trust her."
In other words, she ate him.
Stay Puft Man's big, so that's how we know she's fat--
Just to clarify.

Basketball, a basketball.
Yeah, well, your mother is a basketball.
I went there: your mother is a basketball.
A basketball, she's a basketball.

Stop. Everybody take 5.
Good show, guys, but I don't feel a vibe.
Let it all out; don't hold back; incriminate.
Here on this court, you gotta push it to the limit, mate.
Reach deep inside, throw the shots, come alive.
I'll be here tweeting the whole thing live,
So guys, be loquacious; show off your gall!
What did you say his mother was again? (A basketball.)

A basketball.
After all, she's bouncing like she had a bottle of Adderall.
She's also fat--not sure if I mentioned that--
Twenty-nine inches wide from all sides, to be exact.

Man, that's wack. I object! But, to change the subject,
I double dribbled your Mom's bombs and she liked it.
Now I'm flying higher than a -- Viper,
Where you're airing free throws like a drunken sniper.

I believe you need a reason like you're Zeppelin Piper.
If your mom were on Tinder, I'd swipe her right 'cuz I like her
She's spherical, meaningful, clear and clerical,
A leather planet with the gravity that makes it equivocal

Ooh, feeling it now, moves smooth, so adored.
World's hearing it now, down under to Detroit.
Pity the pal who fails to score a swish,
Never gonna hit the buzzer 'cuz she just won't fit!
Not that curvy's bad boys, who ---?
But the women's NBA's not all round and rad.
Don't be lose ground, be a man;
Do they fit basketballs with gastric bands?

Oedipus Rex, Electra complex,
Pegasus reigns on these state springs but I digress.
Surf's up! I board a tidal wave of jump
Your box probably don't even pump, chump. (Sup?)
I got pump up box, I pump my bar in my hand.
And shoot infinity points from up across this land
So you can't pass the man if you know what's best, son.
'Less you wanna become a Cuban guessing lesson.

Slam dunk! (Foul?) Ref, make the call!
Oh gee, oh gosh, this is all too much
Guys, I gotta confide--I'm just an actress, y'all
Picked last at the dang-blasted casting call.

Some games don't have winners
Some chickens don't end up on plates for dinners,
They contain the innards
But we know the sun will always rise and always fall
And that your mother will always be a basketball

Basketball, a basketball.
If you're listening, your mother is a basketball.
That's right, you! Your mother is a basketball.
She's a basketball, bouncing faster all,
Over the rainbow in the stair,
Somehow, somewhere, someway, somewhere.