Put the Elephant on the Table: How to Talk About What No One Wants to Say

Join David Alan Brown and Rachael Grail of Interaction Associates for a down-to-earth session on making hard talks at work easier—and more productive. You’ll learn how to reduce fear, prepare with intention, listen in ways that keep people engaged, and turn talk into clear next steps.
What you’ll learn
• Why our brains avoid tough topics and how to calm your nerves before you start
• Four prep questions to get clear on purpose, timing, and impact
• A quick grounding exercise (box breathing + a helpful mantra)
• Listening moves that work: bracketing, reflecting back, open “what/how” questions, and checking perceptions
• The ally mindset: be curious, not judgmental
• The 4 steps to build agreement
• Tips for managing up, using “negative polls,” and starting with small, low-risk agreements

00:00 Welcome and Introductions
00:25 Engaging with the Audience
02:00 Understanding the Session's Goals
03:12 Exploring Difficult Conversations
03:54 Reasons for Addressing Difficult Topics
05:22 Challenges and Resistance
07:36 Preparing for Conversations
16:45 Practical Techniques for Effective Communication
21:15 Power of Open-Ended Questions
21:57 Examples of Effective Open-Ended Questions
23:11 Techniques for Listening and Building Trust
24:17 Collaborative Conversations and Managing Up
25:57 Steps to Creating Durable Agreements
28:58 Importance of Checking for Understanding and Agreement
30:36 Handling Disagreement and Co-Creating Solutions
40:34 Final Thoughts and Resources