3 UPDATES: My Kids Berated me During a Family Gathering & Called me a Cheater & a Leech Because...

3 UPDATES: My Kids Berated me During a Family Gathering & Called me a Cheater & a Leech Because 'Someone' Told Them The 'Truth'....9 Years Later They're Trying to Get in Touch With me to Apologize After Realizing my Ex-Husband Paid Money to 'Someone' For This

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For context, I turned 55 a few months ago and have been with my partner Rob (57M) for nearly eleven years. I have two children, my daughter Cindy (33F) and my son Jeff (30M) from a previous marriage. I haven't contacted them for almost a decade, until recently. I’ll get into the details later, but ever since my kids cut me out of their lives, I've been trying to get over it and build a new life with Rob. At times, I felt like I could never be happy again, but after AGES, I finally felt like I'd come to terms with everything and was at a place of peace in my life when everything came toppling down because of one person, my ex-husband Ned.
I met Ned (57M) way back in the day. Our fathers were colleagues, and we’d met each other as kids at office parties and get-togethers, however, we never spoke. He began taking an interest in me when we were teenagers. He’d flirt with me whenever we met and slowly began pursuing me; he’d even visit me at school and take me out. I must admit, I did find all this attention very flattering, and I liked the fact that he was trying so hard to get my attention.
Initially, everything was great. He was a “perfect gentleman” and treated me so well. He was one of those “manly men” who loved the idea of providing.