Holy Thomas and His Friends - song inspired by Warhammer 40k | Parody of Thomas the Tank Engine

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Lyrics:
They’re two, they’re four, they're a thousand and eight,
Marching forth to purge with hate.
Black and gold and steel so true,
They’re the God-Emperor’s crew.
All with holy roles to play,
On the field or far away.
Through the ash and warp-fire bends—
It's Holy Thomas and his friends.

Thomas, now a Dreadnought tank,
Crushes heresy flank by flank.
James rains fire, a brutal knight,
Burns the traitors left and right.
Percy’s servos hum with praise,
Spills the blood in sacred ways.
Gordon’s charge breaks daemon lines,
Glory to the Lord Divine!

They’re two, they’re four, they're a thousand and eight,
Cleansing filth with righteous hate.
Skulls and purity seals too,
All for Terra’s holy crew.
Each with sacred wrath to play,
‘Neath a sky of ash and grey.
Through the smoke where reason ends—
It's Holy Thomas and his friends.

Emily chants machine rites deep,
Wakes the wargear from its sleep.
Henry roars, exhausts aflame,
Storms the heretics in shame.
Edward, kind yet fierce and cold,
Flays the warp-spawn uncontrolled.
Toby, square but dread-endowed,
Tolls the bell of death out loud.

They’re two, they’re four, they're a thousand and eight,
Steel apostles of the hate.
Red and gold and black and blue,
All in service, strong and true.
Waging war without delay,
Far from holy Mars to bay.
Through the warp where madness bends—
It's Holy Thomas and his friends.

Servo arms and bolters blaze,
Marching through the daemon haze.
Fuelled by chants and martyr’s prayer,
No corruption they will spare.
Onward through the endless night,
Engines scream for holy fight.
Sanctioned by the Holy decree,
Faith is fire, war is free.

They’re two, they’re four, they're a thousand and eight,
Litanies annihilate.
Flame and plasma purify,
While the weak just scream and die.
All with forged intent to slay,
Treads of justice crush decay.
Through the warp and all it sends—
It's Holy Thomas and his friends.

“Heretic!” the vox-caster yells,
“Face the wrath of sacred shells.”
Thomas scans, his eyes aglow,
Targets marked, and purge-mode go.
Daemon kin, they flee in vain,
Crushed beneath his armored frame.
Smoke and steel, and faith unbent,
He is the Emperor’s final vent.

They’re two, they’re four, they're a thousand and eight,
Tools of vengeance, never late.
Iron saints and roaring dread,
Sanctified by what they’ve bled.
None may question, none betray,
All must burn or kneel and pray.
Down the line where chaos ends—
It's Holy Thomas and his friends.

#epicmusic #wh40k #warhammer40k #spacemarine2 #darktide

This music video was inspired by Warhammer 40k Darktide OST, Warhammer 40k Rogue Trader, and Warhammer 40k Space Marine 2 gameplay.

Disclaimer:
Warhammer and related trademarks are owned by Games Workshop. The lyrics, music, and artwork were created entirely by me and represent fan-made content, not official media. Advanced tools were utilized throughout the production process to refine, enhance, edit, and improve all aspects of the media presented. Whenever the help of AI was sought, every effort has been made to apply these technologies in an ethical and responsible manner. Thank You.