Self-Neglect, Burnout, and a Compassionate Path to Thriving | Hayley Quinn

In this returning conversation on Compassion in a T-Shirt, I’m delighted to welcome back Dr Hayley D Quinn for a thoughtful and very grounded exploration of self-neglect, burnout, and what it really means to live with compassion.

Hayley is a former clinical psychologist, wellbeing coach, author, and host of the Welcome to Self® podcast. She’s also the past president of Compassionate Mind Australia, and her work sits at the heart of compassion science translated into everyday life.

We centre the conversation around Hayley’s upcoming book, From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A Compassionate Guide to Creating a Thriving Life (released 5 February 2026). Together, we unpack what self-neglect actually looks like in day-to-day life, why so many high-achieving and people-pleasing individuals fall into it, and how it quietly erodes wellbeing, relationships, and vitality over time.

We explore the three circles model, self-criticism, boundaries, values, sleep, and the micro-moments where compassionate action really counts. Hayley also shares openly about the personal journey of writing the book, and what it was like to live the very principles she was putting on the page.

This episode is for anyone who feels stretched, depleted, or stuck in patterns of putting themselves last — and who wants a kinder, more sustainable way forward.

Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome
00:37 Discussing the New Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion
02:00 Understanding Self-Neglect
02:34 Micro Moments of Self-Neglect
04:15 Impact of Self-Neglect on Relationships and Wellbeing
05:33 Burnout Prevention and Compassionate Action
06:56 Exploring the Three Circles Model
11:03 Self-Criticism and Its Origins
13:44 Getting to Know Yourself: Practical Steps
20:39 Reconnecting with Values and Hopes
26:24 The Challenge of Setting Boundaries
28:51 Navigating Relationship Boundaries
29:45 Building Self-Trust Through Boundaries
30:36 The Importance of Sleep and Self-Care
35:08 Compassion and Making Lasting Changes
40:27 Writing the Book: From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion
48:16 Practical Steps for Self-Compassion
52:45 Final Thoughts and Reflections

Links:
From Self-Neglect to Self-Compassion: A compassionate guide to creating a thriving life.
https://drhayleydquinn.com/product/book/
AVAILABLE NOW FOR PRE-ORDER
Publishing 6 February 2026

Hayley’s website: https://drhayleydquinn.com/
Follow Hayley on Instagram: @drhayleydquinn

If you would like to learn more about compassion focused therapy, you can find Dr Stan Steindl's book The Gifts of Compassion here: https://www.ausapress.com/p/the-gifts...

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Video hashtags:
selfcompassion, burnoutprevention, compassionfocusedtherapy, wellbeing, boundaries, mentalhealth, women, genderdiversity