The Archive Employees: A Magnus Archives parody

A Magnus Archives parody cover of "The Schuyler Sisters" from Hamilton.
Lyrics by sa1ntraphael on Tumblr. Vocals: sa1ntraphael on Tumblr as Jon, sadiegoldstein on Tumblr as Martin, bastardhour on Tumblr as Tim and Elias, cuteandquirkyfunandflirty on Tumblr as Sasha and Nikola.

stream it here:   / the-archive-employees-the-magnus-archives-...  

Lyrics:
JON
There's nothing my employees like more than shrugging off work and saying I'm a bore
They misfile reports and they gawk at the people giving statements ‘stead of making them talk
And Elias Bouchard? The man is my superior.
Uh oh! But so little does he come down here
and see Martin, Timothy Stoker, and Sasha blow off all their jobs so they can just do nada
Work, work!

MARTIN
Martin!

JON
Work, work!

TIM
Tim Stoker

SASHA
And Sasha!

MARTIN/TIM/SASHA
The archive employees

MARTIN
Martin

TIM
Tim

SASHA
And Sasha!

JON/TIM/MARTIN/SASHA
Work!

MARTIN
Jon said to be done with that today

TIM
Jon doesn't need to know

MARTIN
These files are all in disarray!

TIM
Okay, yeah, and so? Look around, look around, nothing ever happens in the archives!

SASHA/MARTIN
Archives

TIM/SASHA
Maaartin!

MARTIN
Work!
It’s bad enough that he yelled at me before

SASHA
He always yells on Mondays

MARTIN
It’s bad enough that he thinks I'm just a chore

SASHA
Don't let yourself be fazed!

TIM
Look around, look around —

SASHA
Tim Stoker, remind me what were looking for!

NIKOLA
He’s looking for me!

TIM
Sasha, I'm looking to avoid work (MARTIN/SASHA: Work!)
Looking to avoid work (MARTIN/SASHA: Work!)
Looking to avoid work (MARTIN/SASHA: Work!)
Wooah wooah woah

TIM/MARTIN/SASHA
Work!

JON
Theres nothing like Mondays in the archives.
Recording on tapes ‘cause they won’t save to my hard drives
Excuse me, Martin, it’s really not funny
but could you be competent 'cause youre costing us money?
Tim, why you scrolling on your phone as you kick up your heels
while Sasha on the other hand is doing work during meals?

TIM
Jon, take a chill pill

JON
No, I don't think I will!
You're the one I pay, so do what I say!

TIM
Fine. I’ve been reading this statement you recorded. Did you know that all the labels are discordant?

SASHA
Sorry we’re bad at this, but don't get mad at us

MARTIN
(dreamily, more to himself)
So what's your relationship status?

TIM/MARTIN/SASHA
We took these jobs for various reasons but none of them were genuine interest!
TIM
I'm only here because the details of my brother's death were inconsistent!

TIM/MARTIN/SASHA
Work!

SASHA
Look around, look around, at how much work in the archives we have right now!

TIM
Look around, look around, at how much work in the archives we have right now!

SASHA/TIM/MARTIN
We’re really having a hard time in these archives! Can we survive if we’re wholly unqualified? Wholly unqualified!

TIM
Fine. I’ve been reading this statement you recorded. Did you know that all the labels are discordant?

SASHA
Sorry we’re bad at this, but don't get mad at us

MARTIN
(dreamily, more to himself)
So what's your relationship status?

TIM/MARTIN/SASHA
We took these jobs for various reasons but none of them were genuine interest!

ELIAS
Look around, look around, I see it all happening in the archives! I look around and see it all!
Look around, look around, at how much work in the archives they have right now

MARTIN/SASHA/TIM
Look around, look around, at how much work in the archives we have right now
We’re really having a hard time in these archives! Can we survive if we’re wholly unqualified? Wholly unqualified!

JON
Work, work!

MARTIN
Martin!

JON
Work, work!

TIM
Tim Stoker

SASHA
And Sasha!

MARTIN/TIM/SASHA
The archive employees
We’re looking to avoid work! Hey eyeyyyae! Hey! And we’re wholly unquali- wholly unquali- fiyiyiyiyiyiiyiyiyyied!