🔴Why the Narcissist Desperately Needs You to Like Them Again

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Today, we're diving into a topic that so many of you have asked about—a paradox that sits at the very heart of the narcissistic relationship: The Narcissist Really Wants You to Like Them Again.
It sounds crazy, doesn't it? After all the devaluation, the discard, the cruelty... how could they possibly want your approval?

To understand this, we have to start at the beginning. It is crucial to remember the extensive effort Narcissists invest to initially affiliate with you. Regardless of the specific type of Narcissist or the nature of your relationship, always recall the lengths they went to in order to become a part of your life. These individuals often act as people-pleasers, driven by a strong desire to be liked, especially by individuals like you, the Empaths and other genuine souls.

Let's be really clear about this: they didn't just happen to like you. They targeted you.
You, the genuine soul, the empath, the person with a good heart—you have something they desperately need. You have light, you have warmth, you have authenticity, you have stability. You are a source of 'fuel' so pure, they are drawn to it like a moth to a flame.

But let's go even deeper on this. Why you? Narcissists are deeply drawn to people who are congruent—people where their insides match their outsides. As an empath, as a genuine person, what you see is what you get. Your kindness is real. Your joy is real. Your sadness is real.
To a narcissist, this is like a magical, foreign concept. Their entire existence is incongruent—their inside is a chaotic void of shame and emptiness, while their outside is a carefully crafted performance. Your authenticity is something they want to possess, to own.

Furthermore, they target you because they know your empathy is also your Achilles' heel in their eyes. They sense that you are someone who will give them the benefit of the doubt. You'll be the one to say, "They must be having a bad day," or "They didn't really mean that." You will, in essence, make excuses for their bad behavior—something their fragile ego desperately needs to survive.

So, they put on the performance of a lifetime. This initial phase, often called 'love bombing,' isn't just "people-pleasing." It's a highly strategic mirroring process. They studied you. They listened to your dreams, your fears, your past traumas, and they became the perfect, custom-made answer to all of it. They became a flawless reflection of everything you'd ever wanted in a friend, a partner, or even a colleague. They had to exert this immense effort because their true, empty, and chaotic self would never have passed the audition.

You might then pose the question: If they invest such considerable effort to integrate into your life and our lives, why do their behaviors eventually turn malicious and destructive? The explanation is straightforward: they simply fail. They are unable to sustain the persona and commitment required to maintain a genuine connection with you.

"Disclaimer: The information provided in this video is for educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you suspect you or someone you know may be involved with a narcissist, or are dealing with any psychological issues, please consult a qualified healthcare professional. This content is shared to offer insights and perspectives and should not be considered as professional or medical counsel."

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