What is a toxic family? (a cozy chat)

Hello dear soul 🕊️ Welcome back to the Lightbearer's Library for a new cozy chat—a sacred space for journaling and self-reflection. In this video, we're defining what makes a toxic family.

In this candid journal entry, I’m wrestling with the emotionally charged question: “What is a toxic family?” This conversation is not about labeling people as "bad," but about identifying and defining the unhealthy toxic dynamic that can exist in family relationships. I share my own journey of moving past the "rose-colored glasses" of memory and facing the reality of current dynamics.

If you’ve ever felt obligated, manipulated, or questioned whether to set a boundary with loved ones—especially around the holidays—this video is for you. We discuss why a relationship requires two people to actively want it, and how true self-growth sometimes means choosing the difficult path of saying "no, thank you."

I invite you to check in with your feelings and intuitions to set a conscious, intentional path for your life and your mental health.

✨ Remember, you are not alone in this. I'd love to hear your thoughts and insights in the comments below.

XOXO,
Kate Harmony

Next:

▶️ In [It's okay to say no to Christmas] (   • It's okay to say no to Christmas  ), I dive into the essential conversation about setting boundaries to protect your peace and mental health during the holiday season.

▶️Check out [Why the Golden Rule doesn’t work] (   • Why the Golden Rule doesn’t work  ) for a look at why treating others the way they want to be treated—not the way you want to be treated—is the foundation of healthy relationships and self-aware boundaries.


📖 Journal Notes
0:00 Welcome to the Lightbearer's Library
0:51 The Requirement for a Relationship to Grow
1:48 Defining the Toxic Dynamic, Not the People
5:18 Rethinking the Golden Rule: Treating Others as They Need
8:17 Where is the True Self-Growth for You?
11:32 Trust Your Intuition: Listening to Your Inner Voice
13:07 My Final Invitation for Intention & Self-Reflection

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🌿 About Kate Harmony 🌿

My main channel (Hack Music Theory) has over 250K subscribers and 10 million views. I've been a full-time YouTuber since 2017 and launched this personal channel (Lightbearer's Library) in 2025, where I'm making video versions of my journal entries.

Some of my favourite topics to talk about are practical philosophy, positive psychology, and personality type (I'm an INFP). But honestly, my journals contain counter-cultural thoughts about everything, so expect the unexpected! I also share practical ways I'm improving my mental health, with the hope that you might find them useful too.

I deleted all my social media accounts over 10 years ago, so I offer a loving perspective that's free from the divisive language commonly found in feeds nowadays.

If this sounds like your cup of tea, then I warmly welcome you into the Lightbearer's Library. Stay for a while, and please remember to subscribe:    / @lightbearerslibrary