Apple Store Hired Dogs As Geniuses (Huge Mistake?) 🍎

We just got fired from the most prestigious fruit company in the world. 🍏🍎 Dip and Albert were officially hired as "Geniuses" at the Apple Store this week, but apparently, our definition of "fixing things" involves too many hammers. We jumped on the mics to explain exactly why we were wrongfully terminated. 🔨🚫

First, Albert went into tactical mode when a customer complained about a "Mouse." 🐭 Albert identified it as a cyborg rodent spy 🤖 and neutralized the threat by severing its tail with one bite. We got zero treat for protecting the perimeter. Unbelievable bros.

Then the technical misunderstandings got worse. Albert got into a shouting match with a lady who wanted to "delete" her cookies 🍪🚫 (you DIGEST snacks, you don't delete them!), while Dip tried to send a customer to a Vet because his laptop was infested with "Trojan Horses." 🐴 We were just trying to save the horse dude trapped in the screen!

The final straw was the "Spam" incident. A guy claimed his inbox was full of Spam, so naturally, we confiscated the phone to get the meat out. 🍖 We licked the screen for solid minutes looking for that salty goodness, but found zero ham. The phone was a liar, bro. 🤥

Long story short, the regional manager said we were "bad for the brand" and let us go. We kept the blue shirts though. Anyway pool crew, would you trust us to fix your Apple Device? Let us know in the comments below pool crew! 👇

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