THEY MADE INDIANA JONES BORING...

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Considered one of the greatest movie trilogies (and two more) of all time, Indiana Jones takes us along for the ride as Harrison Ford solves puzzles, avoids snakes, and maybe fucks his students? We're just reading between the lines, folks. After marathoning the first four movies, it's finally time to watch Dial of Destiny... and of course if it has a theme park presence, you know I gotta watch with Zach!

Plot (via Wiki):
In 1944, Nazis capture Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) and Oxford archeologist Basil Shaw (Toby Jones) as they attempt to retrieve the Lance of Longinus from a castle in the French Alps. Astrophysicist Jürgen Voller (Mads Mikkelsen) informs his superiors the Lance is fake, but he has found half of Archimedes' Dial, an Antikythera mechanism built by the ancient Syracusan mathematician Archimedes which reveals time fissures, allowing for possible time travel. Indy escapes onto a Berlin-bound train filled with looted antiquities and frees Basil. He obtains the Dial piece, and the two leap from the train just before Allied forces derail it.

Twenty-five years later, in 1969, an elderly Indy is retiring from Hunter College in New York City. His wife, Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen), has recently left him and filed for legal separation due to Indy's depression after their son Mutt was killed in the Vietnam War. Indy's goddaughter, archaeologist Helena Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge), unexpectedly visits, claiming she wants to research the Dial. Indy warns that her late father, Basil, became obsessed studying the Dial before relinquishing it to Indy to destroy, which he never did.

As Indy and Helena retrieve the Dial half from the college archives, Voller's accomplices attack them. The CIA assists Voller, now working for NASA as "Dr. Schmidt". Helena, revealed as an antiquities smuggler, absconds with the Dial to auction it on the black market. Indy is framed for two colleagues' murders, forcing him to escape through the Apollo 11 moon landing parade, then an anti-war protest. He seeks out his old friend Sallah, now a New York cab driver.

Sallah (John Rhys-Davies) surmises Helena will likely auction the Dial in Tangier, then helps Indy flee the country. At a Tangier hotel, Indy disrupts Helena's illegal private auction, but Voller and his henchmen arrive and steal the artifact. Indy, Helena, and her teen sidekick Teddy Kumar (Ethann Isidore) chase them through the streets in a tuk-tuk. The CIA intercepts Voller after the U.S. government disavows him for going rogue, but his cohorts murder the agents and steal their helicopter.

Inside the Ear of Dionysius cavern, Indy and Helena find Archimedes' tomb, the Dial's second half, and a 20th century wristwatch on Archimedes' skeletal arm. Voller appears and captures Indy, wounding him. Helena and Teddy escape and chase Voller. After reassembling the Dial, Voller reveals his plans to time travel back to 1939 to assassinate Adolf Hitler and help lead Germany to victory in World War II. At an airfield, Voller activates the Dial and locates a time fissure in the sky. Indy is held captive on Voller's stolen plane while Helena stows away through its landing gear. Teddy follows them in another plane.

While approaching the fissure, Indy realizes that continental drift could have altered the timeline coordinates. Rather than 1939, the group arrives at the Siege of Syracuse in 212 BC. The warring armies shoot down Voller's plane, believing it is a dragon. Indy and Helena parachute out just before the plane crashes, killing everyone aboard, while Teddy lands safely. Archimedes finds Voller's body and wristwatch in the wreckage. He gives Indy the Dial but keeps the watch. Indy and Helena learn that Archimedes created the Dial to bring users from the future through fissures that lead only to 212 BC, in order to obtain their assistance in the battle against the overwhelming Roman force. As the fissure begins to collapse, Indy wants to remain behind, feeling he has nothing to return to. Helena, fearing a time paradox and unwilling to give up on him, knocks Indy unconscious.

Back in the present, a recovering Indy awakens in his apartment. Helena, Teddy, Sallah, and Marion are there as well. As everyone else leaves in order to give them privacy, Indy reconciles with Marion.

This is an audio commentary ONLY. It is meant to be watched along with the movie so you can raise or lower the volume on the commentary or the movie itself as you wish.

#phoebe #wallace #gromit