Frustrated with an avoidant partner who pulls away? Understand why and how to invite real connection

If you’re in a relationship with an avoidant partner and feel rejected, lonely, or blamed for wanting connection — this episode will change how you see everything.

Avoidant attachment doesn’t come from a lack of love — it comes from early emotional neglect and a nervous system that learned connection wasn’t safe. In this powerful solo episode, Courtney Wren explains why avoidant partners often withdraw, shut down, or insist they’re “fine,” and why common relationship advice actually makes avoidance worse.

You’ll learn how emotional numbing, shame, and automatic self-regulation keep avoidant partners disconnected — and how to invite real intimacy without chasing, criticizing, or abandoning yourself. Courtney also shares vulnerable stories from her relationship with Mike, including moments where she unintentionally reinforced avoidance and how they repaired it.
This episode is essential listening for anyone navigating anxious-avoidant dynamics, emotional distance, or repeated cycles of withdrawal and conflict.

💛 You’ll learn:
What avoidant attachment really is (and what it’s not)
Why asking “What are you feeling?” can backfire
How shame keeps avoidant partners silent
How to mirror emotions safely instead of confronting
The role of nervous system regulation in intimacy
How to invite connection without doing “all the work”
When compassion heals — and when it’s time to reassess

Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to Avoidant Attachment
01:13 Understanding Avoidant Behavior
17:06 Personal Experiences with Avoidance
21:41 Navigating Avoidance in Relationships
28:24 Compassion and Empathy for Avoidant Partners
36:20 Approaching Avoidant Partners with Care
39:17 Recognizing Avoidant Behavior in Partners
40:19 Common Mistakes to Avoid
51:13 Effective Strategies for Connection
53:37 The Importance of Gentle Mirroring
57:33 Making Requests and Offering Praise
01:04:28 Balancing Effort in Relationships
01:10:05 Final Thoughts and Reflections

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