How Much You Hate How You Feel

Do you hate how you feel?

I’m Carolyn Cowan, a psychotherapist and trauma therapist, and I specialize in shame.
When you’ve lived through abuse or trauma — what I call a tall dark history — and it wasn’t properly dealt with at the time, you will likely have shame. Shame sits beneath your disorders: anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, self-harm, and so many others.

In this video, I guide you through a simple but powerful three-column exercise to help you see:
1️⃣ What happened.
2️⃣ The disorders, behaviours, or coping mechanisms that protect you.
3️⃣ And finally — how much you hate how you feel.

That last one might surprise you. Because how much you hate how you feel is what keeps the loop of shame alive. It keeps the trauma running. It keeps you acting in or out — stuck in the pain of the past and the fear of the future.

When you start to understand this cycle — and work with it — the volume on your disorders begins to turn down. The hatred begins to ease. And you can start to live in the present.

🕊️ Watch this video with paper and pen nearby — and then watch the companion video: “Expanding Your Window of Tolerance”.
Together, they’ll help you begin to break the cycle of shame and start to trust yourself again.


If you want to go deeper, my book Shame: The Path Out of Hell explores these ideas in depth, with tools and exercises to help you process what happened and begin to heal.

Learn more: geni.us/Ksp7AL2

Or join my training Mastering the Addictive Personality: The Path Out of Hell: https://carolyncowan.com/mastering-ad...

If you would like to take on a series of Kundalini Global or breathwork classes with me, you will find several available on demand over on my Vimeo channel:
https://vimeo.com/carolyncowan/vod_pages

You can find information on my upcoming workshops and trainings on my website:
https://carolyncowan.com

You can sign up for my email newsletter for excellent emails, links to any free classes I put on, and to a free download of my Trigger Triage sequence:

https://carolyncowan.com/triggertriage/