Parentification and Adult Anxiety

Were you the ‘responsible one’ in your family growing up?

If you often feel anxious, overwhelmed, or like everything falls on your shoulders, this video might explain why. Let's break down how parentification shapes adult anxiety and what you can do to start healing.

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This video was created by Barbara Heffernan, LCSW for educational purposes only. These videos are not diagnostic and provide no individual consultation. Consumption of these materials is for your own education and any medical, psychological, or professional care decisions should be made between you and your primary care doctor or another provider that you are engaged with. Barbara Heffernan is not available for individual consultation via YouTube, social media, or email, and provides services only in the manner mentioned above.

☀️☀️CHAPTERS☀️☀️
0:00 Introduction – Parentification and anxiety
0:53 Core characteristics of parentified children
1:49 The impact of self-reliance and lack of trust
2:53 “I was the most capable one” – how that mindset formed
3:55 Why these patterns contribute to anxiety
4:30 Step 1: Identify negative core beliefs
5:04 “My needs don’t matter” – the most common belief
6:06 Step 2: Accept your powerlessness
7:27 Emotional boundaries – bubble visualization
8:50 Step 3: Let go of uncontrollable outcomes
10:02 Example: Trying to control your child’s career
10:59 Example: Friend in an abusive relationship
11:47 The need to tolerate increased anxiety during healing