Understanding Guilt (Part 1 of 2: How to Let Go of Guilt ) - Teal Swan

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Because of guilt, you become determined to fix what is wrong with you so you can be treated the way you want to be treated... so you can be loved.

Unless you were raised by wolves, you most likely heard things like this... Don't do that, shame on you, that's a bad girl (or boy), eat that because there are kids starving in Africa, look what you did, do it because I said so, or go to your room.

You concluded based on this kind of treatment that something is wrong with you. You concluded that if nothing were wrong with you, no one would treat you that way. You become determined to fix what is wrong with you so you can be treated the way you want to be treated... so you can be loved.

This cycle is called "socialization". Socialization influences us to the belief that to be loved, we must be GOOD.

But also that our only hope of being good is to be PUNISHED.

What's more than that, our only hope of being good is to punish ourselves when we are bad, because without self punishment, bad would triumph over good. Soon, in order to be good, we replace the punishment our caregivers implement in our young lives with a self regulation system; a system of self blame and self punishment.

We call this system...GUILT.

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Teal Swan is a New Thought Leader and a Bestselling Author who is an expert in human development and relationships. She has over a decade of experience working with people of all walks of life with a mission to reduce human suffering.

Today, she’s also become an International Speaker, having facilitated retreats and life changing workshops in large venues worldwide. Teal was ranked 15th on The Watkins Most Spiritually Influential Living People in 2023.

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